A Moment of Stupidity Part 2 Chapter 1

[eiahmon]

Title: A Moment of Stupidity Part 2: 1,094 - 1,120 Chapter 1
Category: Castlevania
Rating: R for language, and mentions of RAPE and M/M SLASH. Don’t like, then don’t read.
Submitted on:
Disclaimer: Castlevania and its characters and situations are the sole property of Konami. I am making no money or profit off of this fanfiction and no copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: AU. What if Joachim Armster had lived through his fight with Leon Belmont? What might have been different? Well hang on, because Joachim is going to tell you all about it. From his kidnapping and forced turning to his rescue from the ruins of Walter’s castle, and from Trevor's birth and to Richter's death of old age, he tells all - and blames it all on Leon while he's at it.
Section Summary: Part 2 covers the twenty six years between Lament of Innocence and Leon’s death.
SPOILER WARNING!!! Spoilers for many of the Castlevania games!!
WARNING!! This fic my offend the religious! Read at your own risk!

1.

Leon’s Moment of Stupidity

I’m not sure how long I was unconscious. Leon said that it was just over a day before he came down to get me, so I’ll go along with that. It was the weak sense of someone in the room with me that made me come around. I cracked my eyes open to see Leon’s fuzzy outline, leaning over me as he wrapped me in a blanket. The thought that that was strange briefly entered my mind, but it slipped away before I could think any on it. Once he had me bundled up to his satisfaction, he slipped one arm under my knees and the other behind my shoulders before hefting me up into his arms, causing me to moan. My head spun as he stood up, and repositioned me so my head was lying against his shoulder, then he walked out through the skull doors that had fallen off their hinges. I faded back into unconsciousness shortly after that.

It took him nearly two hours to get me out of the castle rubble, I was told later. It was a breeze caressing my face and rustling my hair, something I had not felt in over a century, that woke me as he carried me out. I tried to look around - I hadn’t been allowed outside since Kerwin and I had had our little fling - but I barely had the strength to move my head.

“Don’t move.” Leon said gently as he carried me across the drawbridge and down the gravel drive “Save your strength.”

I wondered what he was planning to do with me. He had just killed my lord and master, so why was he bothering with me? I really didn’t care, as long as I was out of that damned castle! I whimpered as my nerves gradually faded in, allowing me to feel my wounds and the overall pain caused by my body dying from years of starvation. My sense of smell was the next to wake up, and the scent of Leon’s blood began to torment me. Despite his admonishment to be still, I weakly turned my head - which took the time he used to reach the small cabin that sat a little ways down the drive - and tried to bite his shoulder. I whined when I discovered that my fangs were too short to penetrate his clothing. I expected him to drop me and kill me for that, so when he didn’t, I cracked open an eye to look at him.

Was that a smile that he was trying to suppress?

Why in the hell was he smiling?

I closed my eyes as we approached the small cabin, trying to block out the painful brightness of the light coming through the windows, and hid my face in Leon’s coat. I felt him ascending a short set of steps and heard a door open. The smells of potion ingredients, candle wax, smoke, and human blood other than Leon’s filled my nose, making me whine and wiggle in his arms some as I tried to reach the source of the blood. Leon whispered for me to be still, and a vaguely familiar voice said:

“I wasn’t aware that he is still alive.”

“He’s very sick, Rinaldo.” Leon replied “Is there anything I can do for him?”

I was becoming more and more confused by the moment. Why would they care?

I heard a sigh, and the familiar voice said: “Let’s bed him down in the back for now. He needs darkness to rest safely, and the blood of another vampire to heal. Once he’s resting, we will see about anything else he needs.” “There was a pause, then: “Leon, you do realize what he is, do you?”

Leon nodded. “I do.”

“Alright. Let’s get him taken care of.”

I heard footsteps and a door opened somewhere nearby. Leon began walking, and I felt us passing through the doorway. I heard rustling and Leon knelt down onto the floor and laid me down onto a pile of soft blankets and pillows. I opened my eyes and looked up at Leon and whimpered as the contact with the floor after being off of it for a while made my body hurt worse than ever. Leon looked at me, concern written all over his face, and he carefully brushed a few stray hairs from my face. He turned me over on my side, causing me to whimper again, and I felt him undoing the lacing in my leather armor. He turned me over on my back and carefully pulled it away from me, revealing my bloody coat underneath. Leon bit his lip for a moment, looking at me with worried expression. I began to shake, from the chill in the air, and from fear, wondering what he was undressing me for. Leon saw my shivering and seemed to come to a decision. He undid the fastenings on my coat, then moved down to pull my boots off. He set them aside, beside my armor, and covered me with a heavy quilt.

“Are you comfortable?” he asked “Can I get you anything?”

I whined, frightened by the turn of events and what he had just done. I shuddered, feeling suddenly like I was going to cry. Don’t cry, don’t cry, I told myself silently, and oh, if only he would leave the room! His presence was scaring the hell out of me. I had no idea why he had saved me, but years of being Walter’s sex toy and whipping post had conditioned me to think the worst, and the worst is what I was envisioning. I shuddered again and squeezed my eyes shut. I would not watch as he...

My stomach suddenly contracted painfully, and I gagged and tried to throw up. Or at least I would have, if I had had any blood in it. As it was, all I did was dry heave, but it was enough to make Leon move towards me in alarm. I felt his arms come around me, and he sat me up. I heaved several times with nothing coming up before the attack eased. Leon carefully laid me back down and rearranged my blanket over me, tucking it around me and over my shoulders. He sat down beside me, and I watched him with heavy, tired eyes, wondering fearfully about his reasons for him risking his life for me. My exhausted mind could not think of any good reason for him to do so, but it did think of several bad ones that make me shake even harder. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore him and ended up falling asleep with him still sitting beside me

I woke quite some time later. Waking had been increasingly hard of late, and that time was harder than usual. I had to fight to come out of my disjointed dreams and touch reality. It almost wasn’t worth the effort. As I came around, I became aware of someone gently shaking me, which wasn’t gentle enough, as I moaned in pain. What did Walter want with me now? Oh that was obvious; what else did he do that caused me to shake like that? Though, he normally wasn’t so gentle. The shaking stopped with my moan, though I vaguely realized that I was still shivering. Nothing unusual about that.

“Joachim? Wake up, Joachim. I have something that you need.” Hmmm, Walter normally woke me by either slapping me, kicking me, or just plain raping me. He hadn’t called me to wake me in years.

“Joachim? Rinaldo says that you’ve been starved, and he said that animal blood will help you, so I need you to wake up.” I moaned again, smelling the blood that was nearby, wanting to reach it, but lacking the strength to drag myself from the dregs of sleep and reach for it. I felt an arm come around my shoulder and sit me up, and I moaned again as my head spun and throbbed. I felt something cold touch my lips, and I opened my mouth on reflex, reacting instinctively to years of Walter’s training. I felt something pour into my mouth, and I realized with a start that it was blood. It wasn’t Kerwin’s blood, like I had hoped, but animal blood. The voice wasn’t entirely correct; animal blood would keep me alive for a while, but it wouldn’t help me any. It would only slow the inevitable. Eventually, without the blood of a vampire or a human, I would still die. I swallowed, feeling its warmth run down my throat and settle into my stomach. The cup was taken away for a moment, and I whimpered, trying to raise my hands and reach for it.

“I just want to make sure that you’re not going to be sick first.” the voice said “Then you can have another sip.” My stomach growled angrily, but otherwise stayed calm, and the cup was brought to my lips again, allowing me to take another sip. As the cup was taken away again, I slowly opened my eyes to see, not Kerwin’s dark haired figure, but Leon’s blond visage sitting beside me, the cup in one hand, his other arm around my shoulders, holding me up.

As much as I wanted to, Leon would not let me gulp down the blood. As soon as I had taken a sip, he would take the cup away, not giving it back until he was sure that I wasn’t going to vomit. It tormented me, but I did acknowledge that it was a good idea. Once the cup was empty, Leon gently laid me back down and covered me up. He saw that my shivering had not stopped, so he laid another blanket over me. It did no good.

“I’ll get you some more.” he said quietly, then he stood up and walked out of the room. I shuddered, whimpering as the temperature in the room dropped as he opened the door, causing what little warmth that was in the room to rush out. He shut the door, and I burrowed further into the blankets, wishing that Kerwin were there. I was asleep by the time he returned.

******

As much as I needed it, sleep was very difficult to get. Thirst would wake me every hour or so, and Leon would go out and return later with more blood for me. Animal blood, unfortunately, could not satisfy thirst. I was so badly starved and so ill that the only thing that had a chance of satisfying my thirst was another vampire’s blood. And none was forthcoming.

I wondered briefly about that; why hadn’t Kerwin come for me? He had only three days to claim me before any vampire in the area could do so.

So why hadn’t he come for me yet?

I didn’t want to think about it.

I wasn’t sure of the passage of time, since I was barely awake as it was, but I fancied that I could still hear it ticking by, counting down the time until someone other than Kerwin would appear and take me with them. I hoped that it wouldn’t be Actose. And that made me wonder if Kerwin was even in the area still. Had he left after Walter had disowned him and Matatias? I couldn’t see why he would leave, but, estranged from his father, Kerwin only had Matatias, and he would take his son with him, so I could see no reason why he would stay either.

Thinking that Kerwin had left me made my chest hitch, and I started to cry softly. I couldn’t cry any louder; I was too weak. Leon heard me from the other room, for the door opened, and he quietly came in.

“What’s wrong?” he asked gently as he knelt down beside me. I wanted to turn my head away from him, I didn’t want him to see my cry, but I just couldn’t, no matter how hard I tried. Of course, crying did nothing for my flagging strength, and I exhausted myself after only a minute or two. I sagged limply onto my pallet, and Leon reached down to me uncertainly. I don’t know what he was going to do, but I felt a sudden surge of rage at the pity I saw in his eyes and snarled as much as my dying body would allow.

Leon drew his hand back, but he obviously wasn’t concerned over my fit of temper. He knew that I posed no threat to him. That knowledge only made me angrier. When he reached out and picked me up, I growled threateningly.

“I’m going to feed you, Joachim.” he said patiently. He pulled me onto his lap to better hold me up and held another cup to my lips. I wanted to refuse the blood, but the scent of it made the fire of thirst in my veins only burn hotter, and I couldn’t stop myself from opening my mouth and sipping it down. Leon set the cup down and laid me down on my blankets. He laid the two quilts over me and, to my surprise, he scooped me up, blankets and all, into his arms, and carried me across the room and laid me down in front of the fireplace. He tucked the quilts around me, retrieved the cup where he had left it, and quietly left the room.

Once he was gone, I felt my rage abruptly dry up, leaving me tired and feeling despondent in its wake. I huddled down into the blankets, feeling miserable, and choked back the tears that were trying to fall. I still refused to truly cry, and I was NOT going to do so where a mere human could hear me.

The next few times, when I woke up, I noticed that my feelings seemed to be a little out of control. I would get angry and try to fight Leon when he went to feed me. I told myself it was the pity that I saw in his eyes every time he looked at me, but I was fooling myself. It was the same look that I had seen in Kerwin’s eyes whenever Walter beat or raped me. It was sympathy and concern. He cared about me.

And that had me confused beyond all reason. I couldn’t grasp why a human, who had just killed my master, would care one whit about me, especially after I had tried my hardest to kill him. I’m not sure I entirely understand it now, years after Leon explained his reasons to me.

Anger wasn’t the only emotion I felt strongly. It seemed as if every human emotion that had been repressed after my turning came crashing down on me, tenfold what they had been before. I couldn’t seem to keep them under control, no matter how hard I tried. When I bled through my clothes and soaked the blankets, Leon had to change them, often causing me to freeze in terror, despite how I knew that he was not going to hurt me. I sometimes cried when he did so, and then I would get furious at myself for crying in front of him. Other times when I was alone, and unable to sleep, I would be seized by crushing despair that made me want to go crawl into some sunlight somewhere. I’m glad that I didn’t have the strength to do so.

I could see that Leon wanted to comfort me, but he was unsure how to do so, or even if I would allow it. When my despair was at its worse, he would sometimes gently squeeze my skeletal shoulder, ignoring the flinch that it caused, and feed me. And as much as I needed the blood, I grew to fear being fed. Though he never did anything more than sit me up and maybe sit me on his lap if I was awake enough, I started to cringe whenever he touched me. He noticed of course, and he stopped holding me on his lap when he fed me, but he still had to put an arm around me and sit me up. I often cried and tried to wiggle away, but he was able to easily hold onto me, no matter how much I struggled, if one could call my feeble twitches a struggle.

It was during one such feeding time that Leon noticed that I was hotter to the touch than usual. I didn’t notice; I was too busy trying to get out of his grasp and get away from him.

“You’re burning up.” he said quietly. He peeled my blankets away from me, thinking probably to cool me off, and managed to hold me still long enough to get me to drink. Taking my blankets away did not work as he’d hoped, for I began to shiver even harder, hard enough that he had a difficult time holding onto me.

“Joachim!” he said, alarmed “What is wrong with you?” I whimpered as my shaking caused my dying body to hurt even more. He dropped the empty cup, and it clanged loudly against the floor, sounding much to loud to my sensitive ears. I winced, and Leon carefully rewrapped me in my blankets, laid me down, then built the fire up. I felt the heat wash over me, but it only served to sharpen the contrast between its warmth and my cold. I tried to roll over onto my side and curl into a ball, but I was unable to. Leon seemed to guess what I wanted, for he loosened my blankets, turned me over onto my right side, facing the fire, and helped me curl up before winding the blankets tightly around me, even winding one corner of them around my head, like a bonnet. He arranged my pillows about me to hold me there and support my head comfortably. I sighed as some of the heat from the fire began to reach me, but my shivers did not slow any. Leon bit his lip again, at a loss as to what to do. What did a human know about treating a vampiric illness?

I suppose that he thought that more blood would help, and he left the room and returned later with more blood for me. I appreciated the gesture, even as I cringed away from his touch. I fell asleep as soon as I had sipped the last of it.

******

I woke later, hearing voices. I ignored them at first, too tired to care what they were talking about. But I heard my name mentioned a few times, and that captured my attention enough to bring me around. I strained my ears - my senses were failing again - and was barely able to make out Leon’s voice and the familiar one that I hadn’t placed yet.

“You’ve done all that you can for him, Leon.” the familiar voice that Leon referred to as Rinaldo said patiently “He needs the blood of another vampire if he is going to have any hope of recovery.”

“Are there any other vampires in the area?” Leon asked hopefully.

Rinaldo laughed quietly. “Vampires live among us all the time. They are everywhere you look. It is believed that there are several in this area, though no one knows exactly who they are.” He grew serious again. “Unfortunately, they are very territorial from what I understand. None would be willing to take any child of Walter’s in, unless they wished to do him harm.”

Leon was silent for a moment.

“What is it?” Rinaldo asked.

“Rinaldo, do you know of the Count Bernhard?”

“I’ve heard of him. Why do you ask?”

“Would it be possible for him to be... related to Walter somehow?”

“I don’t know. It’s unknown to anyone other than themselves if vampires are capable of having children the traditional way.”

I felt a flicker of excitement course through me when they said Kerwin’s name. It certainly sounded like he had remained in the area!

So again, why hadn’t he come for me yet?”

Maybe he didn’t want me?

I shuddered, which was hard to tell as my shivering was quite hard by this time, and burrowed further into my blankets, feeling cold and miserable. If Kerwin didn’t claim me, then I was at the mercy of whichever vampire reached me first.

“Joachim?” Leon knelt down beside me; he had evidently seen my shudder. “Are you alright? Do you need anything?” I whimpered and squeezed my eyes shut, feeling sick at the thought of being abandoned. His hand came gently down on my shoulder, making me flinch away.

Leon quickly took his hand away. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you. Are you thirsty?”

I whined.

“Alright.” Leon stood up. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” I barely managed a feeble nod as he walked out of the room. I laid in a light doze until he sat me up and pressed a cup to my lips. I drank the blood without really waking, and I fell asleep as soon as he laid me back down.

I had the first of many nightmares that would plague me over the coming weeks. I dreamt that Kerwin appeared, but he had sneered at me and told me that he did not want me.

“You’re ill, weak, and dying.” the dream Kerwin sneered “I’ve no desire to have something as hideous as you in my bed.” Then he had turned away from me and walked away as Actose appeared and began stripping my blankets and clothes off of me. I reached out to Kerwin, begging him not to leave me, as Actose entered me forcefully.

I woke up from that dream with a barely audible scream, my eyes darting around the room. I was shaking harder than ever with terror, and that terror increased when I saw Leon, pinned to the wall with his feet dangling a good foot off of the floor, Kerwin’s hands locked around his neck.

Kerwin was staring at me in shock, and I saw a brief flicker of anger in his eyes before he dropped Leon and moved towards me too fast to be seen. I’m certain that he used translocation. I flinched when he knelt beside me, but he paid it no mind as he gently gathered me up into his arms and cradled me.

“Oh Joachim,” he murmured as he kissed me on the forehead “He told me that you had died.” He kissed me again, this time on the cheek. “I couldn’t feel you anymore.” Another kiss. “I was so worried.” Kiss. “I wanted to come and see for myself,” Kiss. “but he would have killed me before I reached the castle.” Kiss. “Look at you.” Kiss. My skin was starting to crawl from all of the kissing. “What has he done to you?”

I whined and tried to wiggle out of his embrace. My skin felt as if it were crawling off of my body, and my stomach was churning around the blood that I had been given. A pained whimper slipped past my lips; I was going to be sick.

“Put him down!” Leon’s voice, sounding a bit gravelly, came from behind Kerwin, and I heard him coming towards us. “He doesn’t like to be touched!”

Kerwin turned his head and snarled at Leon just as my stomach contracted, and I vomited blood over both of us. Kerwin’s arms cinched tighter around me, and I squirmed even more. I could feel myself starting to panic. I had to get away! I opened my mouth and managed to say one, barely audible word:

“Stop.” Kerwin looked down at me.

“What’s wrong, Joachim?” he asked gently, brushing a few hairs from my face. I tried to gather the strength to tell him that he was scaring me, but fear had wrapped itself around my chest, preventing me from taking a breath. Instead, I gathered the dregs of my power and sent him the telepathic equivalent of a slide show. I showed him my last meeting with Walter, the conversation with Mathias, the fight with Leon, the pain and feel of Walter’s death, and the collapsing link, Leon carrying me from the castle, and his care of me since then. I also conveyed my aversion to touch, and without intending to, the dream I had just had.

Kerwin’s expression blanked out as he processed what I had shown him. Then he looked down at me in sympathy and carefully laid me down on the blankets.

“I’m sorry, little one.” he said softly “I didn’t mean to frighten you.” I cringed at his use of Walter’s pet name for me. Kerwin sighed.

“He’s hurt you so much.” he whispered, reaching out to gently stroke my hair. This time, I managed to contain my flinch. He turned his head slightly in Leon’s direction. “Leave us.”

Leon nodded and quietly backed out of the room, shutting the door after him.

Kerwin tucked my blankets around me since they had loosened during my struggle. He then settled down beside me and crooned soothingly to me until my shaking had decreased some and the panic had receded. Then he asked me:

“Are you ready to go home, Joachim?” I smiled weakly. He smiled, stood up, and removed his cloak and outer robe. I whimpered and tried to shy away, suddenly fearful. Why was he taking his clothes off?

“I’m not going to hurt you, little one.” he said gently, and I cringed again at his use of that pet name. He knelt down beside me and peeled the bloodied blankets away, snarling when he saw my torn, blood stained clothing, and the raw, festering wounds underneath them. He tossed the blankets aside and gently sat me up so he could slip the robe over me. It was warm from being worn, and I could smell him all over it. He bundled me in the cloak and picked me up and held me so my head was resting on his shoulder. He slowly stood up - I had shown him how Leon standing up with me in his arms had caused the room to spin - and carried me from the room.

Leon and Rinaldo were talking quietly when we came into the cabin’s main room, and I recognized Rinaldo as the alchemist that had refused to attack me because I couldn’t fight back.

Kerwin stopped in front of Leon. “Belmont.”

Leon looked at him. “Yes, Lord Bernhard?”

“I know that you were provoked, but you killed my father. For that, I should tear you apart. But,” Kerwin sighed. “you saved Joachim’s life, and cared for him until I could get here. For that, you have my gratitude. Thank you.”

Leon’s face showed absolute surprise, but he managed a respectful nod. Kerwin nodded at Rinaldo, then he walked calmly towards the door. Once he reached it, he stopped again.

“Belmont?”

“My lord?”

Kerwin looked slightly over his right shoulder at Leon. “I don’t need to tell you what will happen to you if you divulge my secret to anyone, am I correct?”

“I understand, my lord, and I will keep your secret.”

Kerwin nodded once. “Good.” Then he walked out of the cabin. I saw Leon wave at me as Kerwin walked down the porch steps. I tried to raise my arm and wave back, but of course, I was too weak to do so. Leon understood, though, and he smiled and nodded.

I hid my face in Kerwin’s shirt as he climbed into a carriage that was waiting in front of the cabin and sat down on the bench. The door shut, and the carriage gave a lurch and began to move.

“You’re going home now, Joachim.” Kerwin said softly “I’m going to take care of you.”

I nestled closer to him, feeling my eyes starting to burn. Something hot and wet fell from my eye and dripped onto Kerwin’s shirt, and I dimly realized that it was a tear. Another one fell, and then another. My chest hitched and more tears ran from my eyes.

“Let it out, Joachim.” Kerwin said gently “He’s not going to hurt you anymore.”

My chest hitched again, and a sob broke free. With a wail that came out little more than a squeaky whine, I burst into tears and truly cried for the first time in 300 years. Kerwin rocked me and stroked my hair and let me cry myself out until I was exhausted.

“Rest, little one.” he said softly when my eyes started to droop “Go to sleep.” I hiccupped once or twice and buried my face in the soaked material of his shirt. I fell asleep that way, safe in Kerwin’s arms.


-- Chapter 2

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