Cliche List - the GazettE

[eiahmon]

 A * means that the cliche has a note attached.
Cliches that have a strikethough are no longer considered cliche for whatever reason. Usually this is due to them no longer being in use.

the GazettE

1. Ruki hates his real name.

2. Ruki does not like strawberries, therefore he must be allergic to them.

3.Everyone likes to get smashed but Kai.

4. When smashed, everyone but Kai likes to make out with one another.

5. When making out with one another while smashed, everyone but Kai will realize their feelings for each other.

6. Kai is the band's mother hen. *

7. If Kai is band leader, he will have fallen out of the bastard tree and hit every branch on the way down.

8. Kai can solve everyone's problems with a few words and a home cooked meal.

9. Aoi/Uruha

10. Ruki/Reita

11. Kai/Miyavi

12. Nothing bad ever happens to Kai.

13. Ruki has the foulest mouth imaginable.

14. Uruha’s thighs will always be the subject of at least one sex scene.

15. Uruha’s thighs are always said to be "creamy".

16. Lips, especially Uruha’s, are said to be "plush".

17. If Ruki and Aoi’s thighs are mentioned - Kai and Reita’s never are - then they are said to be "silky".

18. Aoi can turn into a psychotic asshole at the drop of a hat.

19. Ruki can also turn into a psychotic asshole at the drop of a hat.

20. Ruki/ Kai is almost always friends with benefits. Rarely are they actually in love.

21. Ruki's height will always be mentioned in at least one sex scene or in a recollection of a sex scene.

22. Being teased about his height doesn't bother Ruki in the slightest, no matter how often the others do so.***

23. Aoi is quite the expert at accidentally hurting Uruha’s feelings, often driving the other man to tears.

24. Kai’s smiles are warm enough to melt Artic Ice, and they can light up and entire room.

25. Kai smiles alot.

26. Kai smiles to hide how much he’s hurting.

27. The identity of Kai’s lover will vary, depending on whether it’s serious or not. If it’s just a fling or clandestine thing, he’ll hook up with one of the others. If it’s a serious romantic relationship, he’ll hook up with Miyavi.

28. If Ruki is in love with someone he’ll do one of two things. Either he’ll be happy and excited and eagerly jump the bones of the man of his dreams, or he’ll be frightened and cry in his beloved’s arms before blurting everything out.

29. Uruha has never had a lasting relationship - usually because his various boyfriends were using him for the sex.

30. Ditto for Kai.

31. On the rare occasions that Yune is mentioned, he is always a bastard.

32. Kai is always referred to as "Leader-Sama" even during the band’s downtime.

33. Ruki is a complete hyperspaz.

34. If a Dir en Grey/ Gazette crossover, if Dir en Grey is together, then Gazette is not, and likely won’t ever be.

35. Ruki has a teddy bear that he keeps in his bedroom. Whether or not he actually sleeps with it is open to speculation.

36. When looking for a guitar to strum on, Ruki will always use Uruha’s blue one, never mind that his own is close at hand.

37. If Ruki or Uruha are raped, they’ll turn into timid, frightened shadows of their former selves that cry easily and cling to the person they’re closest to for protection and comfort.**

38. Beneath Kai’s loving, caring, mother hen exterior, is a dominating uber seme. 

*Removed due to Kai admitting in an interview that he really is their mother hen.

** Removed due to me realizing that that is a very reasonable reaction after such an experience. 

*** Removed due to no one teasing Ruki anymore.